The Woman in the Yard Review

Oh, "The Woman in the Yard." Where do I even begin? Is it good? Short answer—nope. Long answer—it’s like when you bake a cake, follow every step of the recipe meticulously, and still end up with something that tastes like regret.

I was so excited for this movie. My friend and I even sacrificed sleep to catch the latest showing. Let me tell you, by the end, I was more awake than the plot. Sure, I get what they were aiming for—a deep dive into depression and grief—but instead of nailing it, they just grazed the surface.

Here’s where things almost worked: Danielle Deadwyler as Ramona. This woman is a powerhouse. Her portrayal of a grieving mother barely holding it together? Chef’s kiss. She oozed the rawness of depression, guilt, and that daily affirmation struggle just to exist. And her kids? Annie was adorable, and Taylor...well, let’s just say he was a one-man testosterone tornado, which was entertaining in its own chaotic way. Peyton Jackson nailed the angsty, questioning teen vibe.

Now, let’s talk about the woman in black (played by Okwui Okpokwasili). Sidebar: I don’t know her, but her jawline could cut glass, and her presence ... Giving—as the kids say. She’s the physical manifestation of guilt or something equally ominous. She’s there, lurking at the property line, and Ramona is like, “Nope, not today, Satan!” except…her “rush” to save her family had the urgency of a sloth at a yoga retreat.

The story teases you with tension that never really delivers. Jump scares? Barely any. Horror vibe? Nah. This is more a moody PSA about how depression affects everyone around you. As someone who understands anxiety and depression, I appreciated its attempt, but the execution felt like a poorly strung-together version of "Get Out" meets "Stranger Things", minus Demogorgons (sadly).

Would I recommend it? Only if you’re doing laundry and need background noise. The acting and aesthetics were solid, but the story missed its mark by a country mile. 

I give it 2 out of 4 acorns because I’m generous like that. It’s not horror—it’s a mildly interesting, meandering drama with a strong jawline and missed potential.